In 2019, I got my Ph.D. in history.
People around me expressed their admiration. Two kids, teaching at the university, many publications, one blog, and an academic degree, what a Wonder Woman I was.
Yet, I did not feel like it.
After 5 years, I reached my goal. And with a sense of horror, I realized that I had never dreamt beyond getting the degree.
Now the game I played while being a student was over. I had to find myself a job as a historian or a university teacher, a career that used to be my dream. This kind of job was challenging to get. Thus, I had time to think for the first time in my life, and darkness crept into the vision ahead. Was I really born to be a scientist? Do I have what it takes? And I came to the sad conclusion that no, this is not me.